Welcome, chaos enthusiast. If you're here, it means you're ready to level up from "Oops, I think I broke something" to "Yes, I strategically nuked prod at 3:27 PM on a Friday, and I stand by my choices." Breaking production isn’t just an accident—it’s an art form. Anyone can fat-finger a config or YOLO-merge a PR, but to truly break production like a pro, you need flair, confidence, and a total disregard for weekend stability.
Step one? Skip the staging environment. Real pros test in prod, because that’s where the real users are—and what better way to discover edge cases than by exposing your masterpiece to thousands of live customers? Bonus points if you deploy straight from your local machine, no CI/CD, no linting, just vibes. And remember: if you didn't write "quick fix" in the commit message, did you even really cause a 2-hour outage?